


Damaged Endings, Whole Beginnings

by GrumpyJenn



Category: Doctor Who RPF
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Kissing, Mattex, Season/Series 07, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-02
Updated: 2012-10-02
Packaged: 2017-11-15 11:41:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 633
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/526919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GrumpyJenn/pseuds/GrumpyJenn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"A vulnerable side she keeps well-hidden..."</p><p>“Never let him see the damage. And never ever let him see you age. He doesn't like endings.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Damaged Endings, Whole Beginnings

**Author's Note:**

  * For [areyoumarriedriver](https://archiveofourown.org/users/areyoumarriedriver/gifts), [Amie33](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amie33/gifts).



_“Never let him see the damage. And never ever let him see you age. He doesn't like endings.”_

_None of us do, River,_ thought Alex. _And what is this episode but an ending?_

As soon as the director wrapped the scene, Alex took off for her trailer. She’d be damned if she let any of them see her cry, these kids she loved and would miss terribly.

She didn’t plan on one of them coming after her, and she didn’t often lock the door on the set; everyone here was respectful of her privacy. Until today when she was standing with her back to the door, making herself a cup of tea as tears threatened to fall into it, and Matt came barrelling into the trailer like a small elephant. Alex hunched over her tea and didn’t turn around, and he stopped dead in his tracks.

“Kingston?” She heard him turn and quietly shut the door. “Are you alright?” She shook her head but still didn’t turn to look at him, and he made a - was it _concerned_? - sound low in his throat. His hands closed gently around her shoulders and he turned her to look into her face. “I didn’t hurt you did I? Or offend you? I know kissing your hand wasn’t in the script, but it seemed...” He shoved one hand through his hair, looking flustered and apologetic, and she found the strength to smile at him.

“No offense taken,” Alex said softly, “It was a good addition to the scene, and Steven loved it of course. I just... I...” She trailed off, looking incredibly woebegone, and Matt took his hand off her shoulder and used it to tuck a springy curl behind her ear, then trailed his fingers down her jaw line. She looked so _sad_ , and he just wanted to hold her, but he wasn’t sure she’d allow it. He swallowed hard as she gave a brittle half-laugh and said, “I guess I don’t like endings either,” in a despairing sort of voice and Matt didn’t even think; he just slid his hands into the wild halo of her hair and kissed her.

Alex sighed into Matt’s mouth as the kiss deepened, and he disentangled his hands from her curls and slipped them down her back to her hips pulling her tightly against him. “Matt!” It was a gasp, and he broke away to stare at her, both of them wide-eyed and panting.

“Oh god, Alex, I’m sorry, I didn’t think, I should have _asked_ , I--” Matt was babbling as she reached out and grabbed him by the lapels of the Doctor’s tweed jacket, yanking his body back against hers. And then it was her turn to direct the kiss with her hands in his hair, and she slowed it down while building more heat, and he moaned into her mouth. “ _Alex_...”

There was a knock at the door and they sprang apart. “Miss Kingston,” said a voice, “You’ve ten minutes until the next scene.” Alex looked at Matt and the shine in her eyes was one of slightly horrified amusement rather than tears.

“Be out in a moment,” she said in a voice rather higher than her usual, and the page acknowledged her and left. “Well,” said Alex in a very soft tone, adjusting the bow tie Matt wore, “What now?”

“It must hurt. That ‘vulnerable side she keeps well-hidden’.” He smiled at her and brought her right hand to his lips.

“Yes. There’s... damage. _I’m_ damaged.”

“Everyone is, Alex. You’re just a bloody fantastic actress so you mask it better.” His voice got a bit hoarse with emotion. “And Alex, I... _this_...” He waved one hand to indicate the trailer, their bodies, those kisses. “This... _I want this_. Damage and all. Not an ending... a beginning.”


End file.
